Post One Hundred Sixty One: And I'VE got the complex

A friend of mine posted a link to this article on his blog. It's an interesting read for purposes of a he-said/she-said point of view of marriage when both spouses work. But part of it set me off: the "she-said" portion of the article reads, in part:

Note to guys: Start by going to the gym. Then try some new music. Or a book. Or a movie. Keep connected to the rest of the world. You'll win--and so will your marriage.

It's a two-way street, lady. And from what I can tell, the guys have fewer problems going to the gym. Or trying some new music. Or otherwise staying "connected" to the rest of the world. In fact, based on my experience it is the wives who have the more serious problems doing any of the foregoing.

Case in point: I have started working out again (every morning at 5 a.m. ) and am taking it seriously since I weigh more than I ever have (232 lbs. now). The wife, meanwhile, complains about her clothes situation, the way people perceive her at work, and how "tired" she always is. She has a Curves membership but hasn't gone in weeks. Think there might be some relation there?

Well, I get home from my haircut yesterday evening and put the kids to bed, and as we are winding down for the night the wife decides to go get some leftover birthday cake. I decline a piece. She comes back upstairs with two frosting-laden pieces of chocolate cake. I make a comment about it, and she jumps down my throat saying I have a "complex" because I've been concerned about my weight.

Never mind that I might be a little concerned about her health, her appearance, and her mental well-being myself. You just can't win.